Everyone makes mistakes. Remember Peter, Jesus' disciple? After spending three years with Jesus, he betrayed him. Still, Jesus forgave him and Peter went on to do wonderful things. Remember Judas? He betrayed Jesus and committed suicide. He never found forgiveness and his life was a waste. Is that what you want?
This is a time for courage. If you are contemplating suicide over this situation, know that your life belongs to God, who loaned it to you. You have no right to snuff it out.
Please go to the person you betrayed and apologize. The person may or may not forgive you, but you will have done the right thing.
Don't weasel out on life. Face it, pain and all. Take your lumps and learn from them. Running from pain only causes you more.
We're praying for you.
P.S. The enemy knows that God has a purpose for your life and he's trying to stop it. Don't let him. Stand, in your love and God and God's love for you, and you will defeat the evil one.
Do you go to church anywhere? If not, find a church. Talk to the pastor and tell him how you are feeling. But most of all, keep doing the next thing. I'm not promising that you will not have losses, but keep praying, seeking God, and His direction. Keep your head high in this storm and one day, it will pass. The sun will shine again. And this dark period of your life will be behind you. There is hope Jeremiah 29: 11 - 13 says "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord,...plans to give you hope and a future.... You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
You are going to make it. I'm praying for you. God is going to see you through this dear one. Please, please do not do anything to hurt yourself. Wait on God. In the meantime, if thoughts of suicide get too heavy, go to the hospital or call 911. Call your doctor as well.
Don't do anything to harm yourself. You are so loved. Please give your situation time, please allow God time to move. He may be waiting for you to give in to Him, to say, God I will trust you, no matter what. Try trusting God and see what will happen.
Also, please go in for a medical checkup and tell your doctor about how you feel emotionally. Your doctor may have medications that can help you get over this 'bump' in the road.
Also, I highly recommend counseling. You may find a pastor in your church or other local church or some other professional who will understand and help you with your struggles.
WE ARE PRAYING FOR YOU!